Am I Wrong?

(Please be prepared, this blog entry is dripping with sarcasm, don't slip in it.)

Have you ever wondered what it's like to be wrong all the time? No, probably not. Most people don't take time out of their busy days to ponder such a thing. Sadly I seem to be learning this lesson, quite often.

My mom used to refer to me as a sensitive kid, just like she was when she was little. Occasionally the Gemini in me was blamed, but for the most part I was just considered overly sensitive. I haven't out grown this over the years.

Does being sensitive mean you are wrong? It sure seems like it.

I'll admit: I over react, I am neurotic, I panic, I cry when it isn't worth it. I tend to make things more then what they are. I get offended, I get hurt and I rarely get over it right away.

A friend does an about face all of a sudden and calls me a string of horrible names without explanation or apology, and I am the one who is wrong for not wanting to be nice to her after that. She again tries to pick a fight for some still unknown reason, and again I am wrong for having a problem with it. Apparently she can do no wrong, but me on the other hand doesn't have that luxury. Another friend decides they are too good to spend time with us, yet I am the one who is wrong for being upset about it. Another friend falls off the face of the earth and when they finally do call again, they act like it hasn't been forever, and yet again I am wrong for being sad about it. The landlord decides to raise the rent which stretches our already tight finances, but because there is nothing that can be done about it, I am again wrong to be worried. I am wrong for letting what people say and do get to me. I am wrong for letting my heart get broken so easily. I am wrong for taking anything personally. I am wrong for being tired. I am wrong for being bored. I am wrong for being lonely.

I can't say all of this is in my head either. My husband sees it. "Unfair but true." I'm wrong, their right, no matter the situation, case closed.

Why is it that my reaction (or as I previously stated, overreaction) so wrong? Why is it that just because I let things get to me that I am just flat out wrong? Why shouldn't I be affected by the things around me? I've asked why it is that no one else can seem to be wrong but me, and there is no apparent justification. It just doesn't seem okay to be sad or mad or worried anymore, I am always wrong for feeling that way.

It's just the way it is, and I am tired of it. But then again that would make me wrong too, wouldn't it?