Stagnant Waters

Ketchup just sucks, so we won't start with him, we'll go with Prissy first. Prissy stopped by last week, not only to use our bathroom but to catch me up on all the juicy gossip. Prissy and Hairy are officially over and if you want someone other then either of them to blame, it's Li'l Mama.

Hairy and Li'l Mama have a weird relationship. It goes way back to when we first all became friends. Prissy had been telling Li'l Mama about all her insecurities in the relationship, one of them being the dangers of MySpace and not wanting Hairy to have one. Less then a week later, Li'l Mama sets Hairy up with a MySpace. She's also the one who kept pushing Hairy towards one of her old roommates, all the while claiming to be friends with Prissy. Anything happens and they run to each other with the information. (This is why Li'l Mama flipped out on me for complaining about her pounding past ten at night, Hairy told her we had complained and some how that turned into ranting and raving about her.)

Hairy either doesn't see or doesn't care about the disrespect and when it came down to Prissy asking, begging for him to at least stand up for her if not limit communication with Li'l Mama, through tears and claiming how much he loved her, he couldn't do it. I'm not saying that Hairy and Prissy were the perfect couple, but their lives would probably had been so much easier if it wasn't for the interfering of Li'l Mama.

Hairy and Prissy are so over that they are seeing other people, it's strange but I guess healthy in a way. Hairy's roommate's girlfriend kept updating Prissy as to what was going on, something neither Hairy or Prissy thought was quite right. Li'l Mama freaked out and changed her MySpace status so it said that "some guy's girlfriend's need to mind their own business." Ha, guess that doesn't apply to Li'l Mama in her world.

Prissy is kind of in the same boat with me when it comes to Li'l Mama, it just isn't worth it anymore. I told Prissy my side of Li'l Mama's picked fights, because of course she had heard about them through the grapevine. She knows, she gets it, she believed me. It was great hanging out with her, though it ended up being a gossip party in the bedroom on the bed because Ketchup was asleep on the couch, something that reminded me of the olden days with my mom and her friends disappearing into her room to chatter for hours. Our conversation ended when Hairy arrived, she had been here to return his ring, and while they behaved better then most exes I know, I bet it wasn't an easy situation.

I'm actually probably going to be seeking out a bit of Prissy's help, considering the letter I am writing to my mom. If anyone understands mother issues, Prissy does. Though she still is for the most part still stuck beneath her mom's thumb, they have had their fights and she has done her rebellion and can still tell the tale.

This whole thing with my mom is daunting. I started the letter yesterday, and while it makes me feel better, I can't help but be terrified at the thought of actually sending it, something that I am becoming more and more convinced that I actually have to do. The hubby says worst case scenario, it will take a few years to work itself out. Years? It could be years before things might be comfortable again with the person who for the first eighteen years of my life, was my everything? It's scary. I feel like I'm cutting myself off from my family, but I can't seem to find a much healthier path then to finally stop pretending, at least with my mom and grandma, the ones I am supposed to be closest to. I want better, we all deserve better. I'm not going to pass this legacy down to my kids, because they sure as hell deserve better. Is it so bad to want to know the people you call family instead of just keeping up appearances with the occasional card? Is it so bad to want to know my mom? Is it so bad to want her to know me? Sigh. Twenty-six years gearing up for this and I'm still not ready. The hubby says you are never ready. Not helpful.

Ketchup... oh Ketchup. The hubby hasn't talked to him yet, having forgotten during the few brief opportunities he had. He plans to talk to him about being so stagnant, spiraling into what he was before he moved in with us. Someone who barely works, smokes weed constantly, doesn't go anywhere and continuously taking advantage of his roommates resources. He can't do that here.

He eats more of my food then I do, drinks more of my soda, watches more of my television, plays more of my XBox then I do and he spends more time with me then the hubby does. It's not fair. Put that together that he can't retain anything we've asked of him (i.e. stop moving the shower head so the bathroom stops getting soaked, put your shoes away so the cats won't pee on them, stop drenching yourself with cologne in the kitchen because it's horrible and choke every time, don't play XBox in the morning because it's my can't sleep medicine, etc) and I'm fed up. The hubby plans to talk to Ketchup tomorrow since they work together. We'll see what happens. I want respect, courtesy in my own home and for him to get out of the damn house every once in a while whether it means trying to pick up more shifts or hanging out with this nineteen year old girl he said he wasn't going to go after, it doesn't matter. Is that too much to ask?

Alright, I have to go. I have laundry to fold, pasta salad to finish, my letter to work on, and a few other things before the hubby gets off (hopefully sooner rather then later.) I also have to post Monday's pictures on my other blog, I keep slacking due to lack of drive to hang out in the living room with Ketchup, but alas, my loyal viewers want more and I am going to give it to them. I'll be back to complain more soon, I always am.